Hazia’s Reflections

My ex-roommate, Tora, and I went to visit our friend, known fondly as Net, at Pantai Hospital yesterday noon. Initially, we planned to follow our other friends who were more sensible and matured. Both of us could be foolish and clueless when it came to these kind of things. Unfortunately, the rest were held up by other commitments, of course they were married. So we ended up being the first in the lot to visit her. Or perhaps others have visited without us knowing about it.

We could tell that the newspaper had a few factual errors and there were too many question marks in the air. We were really anxious but we agreed that if we were her, we wouldn’t want to see anybody. We also decided not to ask her any questions, just to visit quietly, to give her silent support and then leave. To be hit by 2 misfortunes at the same time was a huge test from Him.

It happened that we arrived just as they were about to change the dressing on her legs. So, we waited outside the door. It lasted almost 1 hour, and we couldn’t imagine the pain. We were quite alarmed by the number of nurses who went in to check on her. So many things went through our minds during that 1 hour-period, I couldn’t even describe them. Thoughts of her alternated with reflections of our own lives and how we simply took things for granted.

The last time we talked was like 10 years ago, just before she got married. I remembered helping her shop for her wedding but I didn’t attend the occasion. I’ve never met her husband and now he was gone. God, why did it take a tragedy for us to re-unite? We used to be so close, like sisters! We grew up together.

Finally, the nurse nodded at us and we went in. We were prepared for the worst, to see her lying down, all bandaged, in tears and devastated. Imagine our surprise when we smiled at us. She was sitting up, it looked like she had been crying. Both of her legs were bandaged with iron rods sticking out. But other than that, she was as sweet as ever. She was wearing her tudung so she was prepared for visitors. She was obviously happy to see us. We hugged and started talking.

Tora decided that it was okay to ask Net about her accident. Apparently, the bus that she took from Ipoh broke down and they had to wait by the side of the road. Before they knew it, their bus was hit by another bus which in turn hit the passengers near by. They were rushed to the Ipoh hospital - this was on 15 August. On 17 August, her late husband transferred her to KL, to Pantai Hospital. He collapsed from heart attack while visiting her a week later on 25 August, not the day right after her accident.

We had always known her as a strong person beneath a gentle and graceful facade, but until that moment, we didn’t realise how strong she really was. We were striked by how well she was holding up. She was very calm, not in the state-of-denial kind of calm, but truly calm. She could smile and chat with us, laugh occasionally. We had to be careful not to mention her late husband, children was also a taboo subject because she didn’t have any children. I was glad that we managed to find a few safe topics to talk about. We weren’t prepared because we didn’t expect her to be able to or to want to talk to anybody.

The newspapers portrayed her late  husband as a national hero. I guessed that helped too, it meant so much. She had 10 happy years with him. His friends and family helped a lot. Also, we later realised that the nurses who dropped by to see her were actually genuinely fond of her. Before leaving, we exchanged mobile numbers and told her that we were available to meet up, to talk, whatever. She would be needing all the support she could get.

I was really glad that we visited her. I have just heard that when another one of our friends from school visited her last night, she cried. Moreover, her mother passed away only last year. I hope she gets well soon. We shall visit her again this weekend.