Hazia’s Reflections

I just had lunch with an ex colleague at BSC, we haven’t met for a month. Lot of catching up to do. She has been with a new firm for 2 months already. As bad as it sounded, she said it was still much better than my present company.

We recalled those early days when it was so difficult for us to secure good jobs, the main reason being lack of experience. On the other hand, it was difficult to recruit qualified people for senior management posts; the supply of talents was a bit lacking.

Now that we have gotten here, we knew why. After they reached mid-30s, some women started to change. They may want to focus more on their family, face a pre-mature mid life crisis or like my former MD, want to ditch everything and go train the dolphins. LOL!

After years of hard work, I now find myself being persistantly approached by several potential employers and head hunters instead. However, now that I’m equipped, I’m no longer in the ‘mood’. 10 years of tolerating corporate politics and pathetic characters have killed every shred of passion that I had for my job. My present company was the final blow.

I saw an old email from my MD asking each senior staff to schedule an individual appraisal with her the week of 8 January. Well, sorry, I wasn’t back yet then. It wasn’t an unusual request except that my company has never been big on appraisals; I got one done last year only because I spefically requested for it.

Unfortunately, this time around, I really, really have nothing left to say to her. There might as well be just total silence.

I hoped I could buy some time, a month maybe. I’d have a better idea on what I’ll be achieving on the other areas of my life then. Otherwise, it would be a completely meaningless session. Sigh!