Hazia’s Reflections

During my first year in university in 1992, a friend died in a motorcycle accident. I think that was in the holy month of Ramadhan.

His girlfriend also studied in the same varsity. We knew both of them from our boarding school days, they had been together eversince we were 16.

Our friends debated on who should tell her about the accident and his death. The ‘chosen one’ bravely went into her room, followed by a group of girls.

She tactfully started with, "Be patient, N was involved in an accident…," Before she could finished, the girl cut her off and started crying, "Apa? Nak jumpa N! Mana N?" (What? I want to see him! Where is he?) To everybody’s horror, somebody untactfully said, "Sabarlah, S. Tuhan lebih sayangkan dia." (Be calm, God loved him more).

She was shocked. "Apa? Accident aje kan?" (What? Accident only, right?)  She rushed out of the room, weeping hysterically. They followed her.

Well, that was a delicate situation as parents on either side weren’t aware of their relationship. This despite the fact that they were together for like 5 years.

She joined a group of friends and visited his parents a few days later. Unfortunately, 2 of them were involved in a light motorcycle accident on the way back. Thank God it wasn’t serious.

Her roommate told us that all she did at first was cry herself to sleep day and night. It was painful.

They made sure she was seldom alone and took her to the cafes for meals. Everytime she saw other couples together, she would cry. My roommate said that what bothered her most would be her uncertain future. They must have planned a lot of things together.

Initial response aside, I’d had to say that she handled it really well. She didn’t postponed her studies. She picked up her books and yes, studied. Our final exams were due in 3 weeks and she actually sailed through it.

She was lucky to have her knight in shining armour. A friend of her late boyfriend who had liked her for quite sometime quickly stepped in. He showered her with words of comfort and religious books.

Soon after, they became a couple. Of course, at first, she was concern with what people might think. It was as if she found his replacement almost immediately.

They were married right after graduation. We last heard from her a week ago. They are now happy with 4 kids.