Hazia’s Reflections

Guess what? I’ve just got a new holiday plan before Ramadan. My new best friend has asked me to go with her to Kudat to visit her pet bro’s factory, the one she matchmade me with 2 weeks ago. Let’s call him Mr Coconut, I’ll leave out the reason, hehe…

She said during her last few matchmaking attempts over the years, his reply was "macam tu lah" (like that lah). So, she didn’t pursue. When she asked him about me, he said "ok, boleh (yes, can)." That made her estatic. Especially since her family is leaving the country soon, her husband was just assigned abroad. She didn’t want her pet bro to be lonely.

Unfortunately, his speed is killing her and me. Being my impatient self, I want to move fast. Yes or No? She was equally impatient, if not more. She asked him many times. The summary is that he wanted to approach this slowly, claimed that he is older and wiser and knows how to handle it. He also didn’t want us to fight, considering how close we are. He said he’ll wait for the RIGHT TIME.

He had turned down her few attempts to arrange a follow-up date for us. Obviously, he thought it was her who was so fixated on bringing both of us together. So did her husband. Little did the guy realised who was behind the charade. I got her to do all the dirty work for me, and she did it gladly too. Hehe… I had a feeling that he wanted to be in control - he subscribes to the old school where a man makes the first move.

Yesterday at lunch, she unveiled more and more. Initially, she told me that his last girlfriend (6 months ago) - whom he wanted to marry but decided against - was insecured and jealous of her. I hinted that probably it had something to do with his only daughter who is 14. Out it came - she does modelling for advertisements, a very pretty girl but spoilt and overly attached to her father. I wasn’t surprised, he has raised her alone ever since she was 3.

She said he turned bitter after the divorce. It was as if he became a different person. He had to sell his house and move in with his older sister.

To make matters worst, I think my friend is also too attached to him, like she was jealous of his daughter. She wanted us to be together but at the same time, she didn’t want us to abandon her. Probably she did it without realising, but she turned my request to have a one-to-one date with him into a threesome, and later she invited several more people. Her husband told her off. Mr Coconut must have felt the same way because he said he was busy, initially he was excited about it.

Being an extrovert, my friend enjoyed larger company and assumed we have the same personality. I made it clear to her. We may seem alike but we are total opposites, I’m an extreme introvert. I don’t like ‘3′. If things work out, it’s either I hang out with her OR I hang out with him OR she hangs out with him.

My preference is still one-on-one. I hated complex things and I thought that this old man’s life was way too complicated for me. I was about to give up, especially since she said she had a single 35-year old friend who was dying to be introduced to me. That sounded simpler and much more appealing.

Suddenly today, she had news. He wanted to say ‘hello’ to my boss since she is my supplier, and he is her business partner. She said this is a very busy time for my company, so he has to wait another 2 weeks.

But, I get it. He wants to say ‘hello’ to me too. This is the RIGHT TIME for him to make the next move. He wants it to look like a coincidence, or in the course of business. Yes, old people know better.

Like she said, at least he lets me see his appealing and not appealing sides. She knows him well, she couldn’t say the same with her 35-year old friend.

And I saw the kindness on his face when we met. I had a good feeling about it. I know that at least appearance-wise, I passed. So, I said ok, I’ll give your pet bro a chance first before moving on to others:)