Hazia’s Reflections

It’s been 4 ‘action-packed, emotionally-draining’ days. Gosh, I don’t even know where to start. I’m not even sure what category to update first - work, personal or writing. I’ve been tied up with an international exhibition for the last 3 days until 6pm, followed by dinner. I’m more than exhausted.

I returned immediately to an empty office, yeah on Sunday evening, and burst into tears. No, it was not a disaster. Everything did go well, too well perhaps. It was not tears of joy either. The on-going tension was way too much for me, and I had to let go.

I’d have to say that this event has taken my definition of ‘FEAR’ to a different height altogether. I was terrified, yeah, I could feel that something would go wrong or the bosses would pick on something. Or some jealous creep would ‘cucuk’ them. Some people are already actively trying to bring my department and me down. Only God knows the swing of my heart rate. My senior colleague even agreed to treat his department and my department’s team members if we don’t get screwed over this event. That’s how low our goal has become - tak kena marah pun dah bagus. Pathetic.

When I arrived at the exhibition hall on Friday morning, the bosses didn’t comment on our pavillion at all. In fact, they asked me to help attend to a subsidiary’s booth instead. So, I concluded that it was perfect.

Our pavillion design was stunning and everybody took turns to pose in front of it. We even took photos with the 2 Tuns, No 1 posed alone after that. It outshined the ministry’s and the organiser’s booths. It was also strategically located facing the entrance. The counter design made people think that it is a reception counter and the traffic was high all the time. 3 staffs manning the booth simultaneously was not enough.

To add to it, I just found out on Thursday that we had to host a dinner for the international delegates on Saturday. Thank god it went smoothly. Buffet style with cultural dances, we even gave everybody a little batik gift. Oh, we confirmed 80 pax but 100 turned up. There was barely enough seats. My colleagues and I had to sit outside. The bosses didn’t have any problem with that though, as long as there were no empty tables, they considered it a success. Well, it was a bit messy at first when I came back from solat Maghrib and found the international guests already eating. The local VIPs were yet to arrive. Some tables had even ordered liquor, I managed to limit it - someone told them that it was culturally insensitive in the presence of the ministry’s reps. Phew!

This was so different from the dinings that I used to host when I was with the hotel. All I had to do was brief my F&B expat colleagues, seek their recommendations and decide. During the occasion itself, I could just relax and mingle, be the perfect host and not have to worry about a thing.

Back to the exhibition, I knew it was too good to be true. Just now, 1.5 hours before it ended, our subsidiary’s chairman criticitised our buntings -  they did not include photos of our subsidiary’s outlet, but rather 2 generic ‘created’ outlets. Emm..,. those are supposed to be corporate buntings - to inspire small, local entrepreneurs to think out of the box and aim high, not to directly promote our subsidiary’s products. Anyway, I’m glad that he talked to me directly, and not through Popeye.